Home, home on the range...

Wow! Its been almost two months, but this time I have a good excuse. I moved 1200 miles away from Virginia to central Kansas.

The move was really hard. When my husband and I got here to Ft. Riley we immdediatly started looking for a place to live. Post housing for officers has a year long wait. It did not take us long to find out that there was hardly anything available. There are houses here to buy, but if you want to rent there is just not much. Apparently most people here rent because most assignments to Ft. Riley are only two years. So, we looked and look and kept coming up empty handed. We did finally find two places that we were trying to decided between. One was $100 dollars over (did I mention rent here is outragous?) the max we wanted to pay, and was in basically a retirement neighborhood. The other was $300 cheaper, but was really small and in a questionable neighborhood. We had decided to call my husband's mother for some advice and while we were talking to her we got another call. It was a property manager who mentioned a duplex that we had been really interested in. We already knew that the place had been rented and assumed he was just calling to tell us that. Then he said he had another house that had just gone up for rent and started telling us about it. I couldn't believe it. The house is WONDERFUL!!! It turns out the house belongs to the property manager. Him and his wife custom built it because they planned on retiring here. Then as so often happens plans changed. I still even as I sit here in this house can't believe it fell in our laps. It has three bedrooms, three bathrooms, a full finished basement, two car garage, a fenced in yard, and an awesome tub in the master bath. We dont' really have enough stuff to fill it up, but that is just fine with me. In fact when the movers delivered our household goods they said you guys sure dont' have much stuff. That made me really happy because they see A LOT of stuff!!

This is a long entry. I am not sure where I am going with this blog, but I am going to start keeping it up better. I hope to post some outfits, but it is not going to be all about fashion. Also I have been feeling very crafty since we got here. It's such a good feeling to want to make things again. I had gotten out of sewing and painting and taking pictures, but this house just relaxes me and I feel creative here.

Hopefully...

Let's see if this works..

Testing...

Been having blog problems...lets see if this posts.

"Until they all come Home"

Celebrating Four Years of Marriage

Tim and I are celebrating our fourth anniversary this Thursday! Now for a small story: We met on May 6th, 2006. I was at work and took my lunch break with my friend Lindsay. It just so happened that she was meeting an old friend for lunch. The friend was Tim! Lindsay and Tim are both from Seattle, WA and went to highschool together. They found out over the internet that they were living in the same part of the country. Tim had come to Tennessee for the Army and Lindsay's husband's job had transferred them here. I thought Tim was cute that day at lunch, but really didn't think he was interested. Well apparently he was because the next day he asked Lindsay if I was seeing anybody and if I cared if he called me sometime. Of course I said yes give him my number!! We went out that weekend for the first time, and were together ever since. Thirteen months after that first meeting he blessed me with his hand in marriage, and we couldn't be happier.

Here are a few pictures. The first couple of when we were dating. In the first we are outside the Grand Ole Opry in Nashville, in the second we are at Pike Place Market in Seattle on Rachel the Pig. Then of course the last few are of our wedding day!

Problems with Polka Dots!

I LOVE polka dots!! Its gotten really bad. I have had to start really watching myself or every piece of clothing I own would have them. This was what I wore a couple of days ago. The white leggings are back. That is what I do if I feel something is a little too short. The dress is from ModCloth. Also I am sure anyone who reads this has noticed that I shop there a lot. That is because I have a very hard time finding vintage clothes that fit me, so I have to go for vintage reproductions or vintage inspired clothes are nice too.

Did I Cross the Pond??? NO it's Foamhenge!!!

This past Saturday Tim and I drove to Natural Bridge, VA to see Foamhenge!! It is a full size replica of Stonehenge made out of foam. How cool is that?!! It was quite interesting. I was expecting a big tourist attraction, but instead there was one small sign and then a one lane road. We were the only people there which was fun because we could run around and take whatever pictures we wanted. The artist who did Foamhenge also has a dinosaur exibit just up the road, but it does not open until June. I was dissapointed we didn't get to see that too, but Foamhenge was quite fun! Just the kind of quirky odd thing that I like. Here are a few pics.

Mealz and Clothes

Tim and I started a new meal plan program this week called Emealz. Maybe you have heard of it. It was brought to my attention by a friend and seemed like it could be a good idea. You have to subscribe to the program for two people it is $1.25 per week to subscribe. Every Friday there is a list of five meals and recipes, and a shopping list of exactly what you need comes with it. Having everything all planned out is supposed to save you money and create less waste. We did spend considerably less on groceries this week, and also seemed to have less waste. I also did it because we were in such a meal rut, and never seemed to eat dinner together. We would each go to our desks or the couch and eat there. Now we are sitting down at the table together everynight, and cooking the meals together too. I think that little bit of time at the table everynight is going to be a really good thing for our marriage, and we will be in the habit of it already when we have a family!

Here is the only picture that I got of what I wore yesterday. I tried to take some around my apartment complex, but they were mowing the grass, and the guys kept looking at me like I was crazy. It does not bother me for people to see me take pics of myself, but the way these men were looking at me was really getting on my nerves. Anyway the irritation really showed on my face so I had to scrap the pics. The dress is from the wonderful ModCloth, it is a bit short so I am wearing white leggings from Kohl's, and if you can see it a pearle necklace my husband gave to me. I am almost always barefoot around my house. Unless my feet get cold then I wear fuzzy socks!

Tell me if you do Emealz or are interested in trying it!

I'm Back!!

The husband and I have succesfully moved to Virginia!! However, it has taken awhile to get our household together. We had some trouble finding a place to live. We thought we were going to live on post, but there was nothing available. Then we went looking for a house to rent, but nobody would rent to us for just six months. Finally we found a nice apartment and they did a six month lease! We really like the apartment. It's really quite large, and the complex is very pretty and quiet. After we got our apartment we had to go on the hunt for internet service. That was much more difficult that it should have been. We thought we could just work off of our Ipad, but there is hardly any signal here. That meant we had to get a home phone, because cell phones don't work out here. I think thats really weird for an apartment complex. This is the first time in my entire adult life that I have had a landline. I never saw the point in having both.

It took a week after we "moved into" our apt. to get our household goods. I know I talk about wanting to be less materialisic, and going a month without any of my things was a good lesson in what I can live without it does get really hard when you don't even have a frying pan!! That is the stuff that was the hardest to live without is the kitchen stuff. Sandwiches get old in a hurry and eating out all the time is so expensive. I am very happy to be able to cook meals again.

Now that I have internet I will be back to regularily reading and commenting on all my favorite blogs. I can't wait I have missed reading everyones posts. Here are a few pics from a party that my mom gave for us before she left. While not necessary many people gave us giftcards to restaurants. Those came in VERY useful while we had no cookware. We are very thankful to everyone for coming to the party and supporting us in this next step of our life.

Easter Dress Etc...

This is the dress I wore to church on Easter Sunday. Sorry about the blurry pics. Just as soon as I stepped out to take them it stared to rain, and continued to rain ALL day. These were the only two shots I got. The dress is from Modcloth and the pearl necklace was a gift from my husband.

On another note I am going stir crazy! My house is empty and the weather is terrible. There are streets closed and trees down everywhere, so I can't go anywhere. All of my stuff is gone so I can't sew or start on anyother type of project. I can clean, but seriously, how much can you clean an empty house.

I keep thinking about all of my stuff that is in storage until we get to Virginia. While we were preparing for the move we got rid of A LOT of stuff, but now I can think of so much more that is going. When all that stuff gets unpacked I can't wait to go through it and get rid of more. I am still struggling with being materialistic. The truth is I like my gadgets. You know like my computer, cameras, kindle, ipad, nice tv. Ok I am making myself sound really bad here. Is there away that I can enjoy having these things, but not feel selfish? I do give back in many ways. I give money to various organizations and I volunteer my time to help other Army spouses. For right now I am going to concentrate on getting rid of more stuff when we get moved. All of which I plan on donating to the Back Door Boutique. I am hoping that these things are a step in the right direction.

Pretty In Pink

I have been slow on these outfit posts, but they will come more frequently when I am not living out of a suitcase. That being said my husband and I move this coming Friday! I am so excited/nervous. It feels as if we have been saying goodbye to everyone for so long. Also I am really going to miss my house. In the two years we have been in this house I have tried not to get to attached because I knew it was only temporary. Now that we are leaving I am feeling nostalgic. I will update as I can during the move, but who knows what kind of internet connection I will have. Hope everyone had a wonderful Easter!!

The influence of each human being on others in this life is a kind of immortality

Last night while having dinner at the local Applebee's my husband suddenly started acting weird. First I thought he was watching ESPN on the TV that was over my left shoulder. Then I realized that he was staring at a large picture on the wall. Just was I was about to askhim if he was ok, because he was looking pretty confused. He says "No, what the heck! Is that? Wait it is me!!!!" The restaurant remodled this past summer and used a lot of pictures from our town and the Army Post here. Well it turns our that one of their wall size pictures has my husband in it!! How cool is that? Of course we took his picture with the picture. He is the one just behind the little puff of blue and pink smoke. Of all the soldiers at Ft. Campbell we could believe that a random picture with him in it would be chosen for this restaurant. I guess Clarksville, TN will forever have a little piece of Tim now, or they will until Applebee's remodles again!! :)

Disney World 2011!!!

I spent last week in Orlando, Florida with my parents and my Mom's "sister-cousin" Billie-Jo. We had a BLAST!!!! It was BJ's first time to go, and she is in her fifties. I was so excited to experience it with her. I also found our a neat little piece of info about my dad. He lived in Clear Water, FL when he was in his twenties (many years before he met my mother) well Clear Water is about 60 miles from Orlando and Disney World. He was living there when the Magic Kingdom originally opened and went on opening day! How cool is that?!!! Oh, and he took my mom there for their honeymoon in 1978!

We didn't make it to quite as many parks as we had planned due some health issues on BJ's and my Dad's part. Don't worry they are ok. Only stuff that was to be expected with some ailments they each have.

We went to Epcot first and did all the countries. Then the next day we rode our to Tampa and Dad drove us around to see his old house and where my sister's went to school. Then we walked a the beach a little. Then we went to Bern's Steakhouse. WOW!!! It was an awesome place! My dad treated us all. He also took my mom their during their honeymoon, and their anniversary is this Thurdsay (April 14th) so it was kind of a second honeymoon. At this restaurant we had our main course in the dining room and then went on a kitchen tour, then a wine cellar tour, then up to a separate dessert room where everytable has its own little enclosure that looks like a wine barrell. I highly recommend this restaurant!!

The next day we went to the Magic Kingdom and it was AMAZING!! I have been there six times now and I always feel the same way when I walk down main street and see the castle up ahead. I can't even describe it I just feel so happy when I am walking down that street!

After a very fun but very long day at the Magic Kindom my parents and BJ went to Sea World the next day. I was not feeling well myself that day, and Sea World is not my favorite, so I stayed in. Actually it was very nice I had a lot of time to read and did a little bit of writing.

The next day my mom, BJ and I went back to Epcot to do all of the stuff in the begining of the park that we missed on the first day. I love Spaceship Earth!! After several hours of learning about the future and how they grow plants and Epcot etc. we headed on out and spent a little time at Downtown Disney. It was a neat place, but I think would have been more fun at night. There was a House of Blues restaurant there and I really wanted to have lunch there, because Tim and I ate at one on our vacation to Chicago last year and it was great! However, Mom and BJ were not really feeling it. No big deal.

Then it was time to make the 14 hour drive home. It was a hard drive lots of traffic, but we made it. I have to say I much prefer to fly, but it not always practical. So, that was our trip! It was great and I was really glad to get to spend some quality time with my parents before Tim and I move at the end of the month.

*More pics to follow I have to finish resizing them so more will fit into a post*

Headin' South!!

Saturday morning I am heading down to Florida for a week with my family!! We are going to Orlando and plan on going to all the parks in Disney World and Sea World. I am so very excited!! I have not been to Disney World in at least 10 years. To me it truly is the happiest place on earth. You just can't help but smile when your there. The only bad part about it is that Tim will not be able to join us. I know he would love to, but duty calls. Of course I will miss him, but I do appreciate how supportive he is being of me taking this vacation.

Our group that is going will be my mom, my dad, and my mom's first cousin Billie Jo. Billie Jo is a blast and I can't wait to spend the week with her! We are driving down. Which I was not too happy about. B.J. is afraid of flying, so she wants to drive. While I told her there was nothing to it she is still afraid. I really can't blame her I know she can't help it. I have the worst fear of heights and not matter how hard I try I can not seem to get over it.

Well expect lots of pics when I get back!!! Probably will not post any blogs while we are gone, but should be able to comment on all the blogs I regularily comment on.

Busy Bee!

Lots has been going on! As we get prepared to move to Virginia there is a lot to do around our house. The Army has people who come in and pack and move us, but everything has to be prepared for them to pack. Also we are renting our house, so we have to do a few things to make it more rentable (is that a word??). The most major thing was painting a blue accent wall in our living room back to the color of the rest of the house. This of course involved a lot of moving furniture around and then it had to stay that way because the wall had to be primed and then painted twice. Glad that is done with!

I went walking in Nashville on Sunday with a good friend. We went to the Greenway. I'm not sure if other areas have Greenways, but we have quite a few here in middle Tennessee. They are just paved walking trails that lead around the outside of the city or town they are in. Often times they weave past old buildings or railroad tracks. I love them! This one is in Nashville, about sixty miles south of where I live, and the bridge behind me is a pedestrian bridge over the Cumberland River. I love that bridge. Actually I love bridges in general which is strange because I have the most terrible fear of heights.

This Saturday my husband and I are helping to host a Military Ball Etiquette class. I hope that it is very beneficial for the ladies who attend. I am modeling an appropiate and an inappropiate dress. Lucky for me my inappropiate dress is just a maxi dress I already had. I was not going to be happy if they wanted me to wear something short or lowcut. Anyway I doubt I will get to take pictures, but if I do I will post some.

Tonight my husband and I made stuffed peppers for dinner. They were sooooo good!! But so rich that I could only eat one of my two.

There is a pic of our living room while painting. Me on the Greenway, and peppers from tonights supper.

Rockchalk, Jayhawk!!

This is what I wore for the NCAA basketball tournament today. My husband is a huge Kansas Jayhawk fan. I am not much into sports, but try to be supportive by wearing his team mascot on game days.

To be honest these pictures did not turn out very well. My tripod has gone awol, so I had to make do with setting the camera where I could. Also the sun was way too bright, and it was windy. Oh well! The pictures will get better.

The Jayhawk shirt I am wearing came from Old Navy as are the skinny jeans. The red belt is from Amazon. The scarf I think is from Target. I have had the scarf for years, and of course my ever present Converse sneakers. Have no idea where I got this latest pair.

If you are a basketball fan I wish your team good luck during March Madness!!

New Idea

So, I think I am going to give fashion blogging a try. I love clothes and fashion. Clothing has always been a huge part of my life. No matter my age. I went through a lot of different phases. When I was young I would go and dig out my mom's old clothes from the 70s and wear them. She always hated that. I think she was afraid that I would get made fun of in school, but I really didn't care. Maybe I will dig up some old pics and post those. It may be a little slow at first with our move to Virginia coming up at the end of April, but I will catch up. Also with the traveling we intend to do on the weekends while husband is in school up there I should have some very fun locations for photoshoots!

Speaking of the move, we should have a better idea by the end of the week as to where we are going to be stationed after his school in VA. I just hope we go somewhere interesting. Europe would be AWESOME!!! I would love to see the fashion there

Look for my first fashion post this weekend. Being that it is the NCAA Basketball Tournament and my husband is a huge Kansas Jayhawk I am thinking I will do something in the shirt I bought for the games. See if I can give a basketball t-shirt a little style!! ;)

What is the Deal with Denim?

If you see me often in my everday life most people are surprised that I hardly ever wear jeans. I was thinking about this a few nights ago when one of my friends said she was surprised to see me wearing jeans. The truth is jeans don't fit me very well. They are either too tight, or too short, too long, the rise is low or too high. Then there are the different shades of denim. It overwhelmes me!! That being said I do wear jeans. I have a couple of pair right now that I like. One is flared and one pair is more skinny. They are both very dark wash. I do not care for the lighter washes.

I have been trying to figure out why I am not a fan of denim. Maybe its because it seems as if everyone wears jeans everyday. It just gets old. People wear them with everything too. Have you ever thought of pairing your sweater with a nice pair of dress pants or a skirt? Those things do not have to only be for work. I wish that people would step out of their comfort zone and wear nicer things. Sure as I write this blog I am at home, and I am wearing an old pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. But I am at home! People should take more care of how they look when they go out. Not just women. Men should want to look nice as well.

I have not taken many pics lately, but this is one of a new dress my mom-in-law bought for me. I LOVE it!!!

Rain,Rain Go Away!

Usually I love rain. Provided it does not cause wide spread flooding that damages many homes and businesses, but it has been rainy and stormy her for about a week. When it's not storming it's just cloudy and damp. It really wouldn't really bother me except that I want to do a couple of photoshoots, and right now it's either pouring rain or the ground is just too soggy to do outside shoots.

As for other happenings. My husband finally got his offical orders. Now like it or not we are headed to Ft. Lee, VA. He is attending a school there that will last for six months and then we will be moving somewhere else. We intend to spend this time in Virginia to explore the northeast. The place that we hope to make it to while there are New York City, Atlantic City, Philadelphia, Baltimore, Virginia Beach and Washinton D.C. The only one of those places I have been was D.C. and that was when I was 14, so I would love to see it now when I can appreciate things more. Oh, and I forgot, we have to see Foamhenge!! It is a fullsize replica of Stonehenge made out of foam! To me it sounds super cheesy, but hey cheesy usually equals fun to me. I know that our list of cities sounds a bit ambitious, and we may not make it to all of them. But I do hope that we make it to D.C., NYC, and Atlantic City. Those are the main places I really want to get to while we are living close.

I have not posted any pics of me in a while. The first one is me being silly with my phone, and the second is one of those pictures they take of you at various attractions then add in the background. In this one its me, my parents, husband and mother-in-law. We are in Seattle, WA about to go to the top of the Space Needle.

What I have learned to Love about Me

Just a little over a month ago I turned 30 years old. Since my birthday I have been thinking a lot about the things about myself that I didn't always like. Things that I have not only come to terms with, but have learned to love.
-My Curves- I have been a curvy girl for pretty much as long as I can remember. While I have gone up and down a bit on my weight I never lost my curves. There was a time when I didn't really like having such large breasts and wide hips, but now I love my body.
-My long nose- I was blessed with the Matthews (my maiden name) nose. By that I mean a big nose. For most of my life I hated it, and was saving for awhile to have a nose job. I do not really know when my feelings changed, but over time I realized that I didn't hate it anymore. There are still occasional times when I see my nose in pictures and I think it's too big, but I know I would never change it. It is simply part of what makes me me, and if I were to change it then I am not sure that I would still feel that I looked like me. I hope that last line makes sense to other people and not just me!
-My pale skin- I have a VERY fair complexion. Just look at the header for this blog. That is what I look like all the time. I never let myself get a sunburn. Part of that is vanity I do not want to look old before my time, but I also am at high risk for skin cancer. Even more than I do not want to look old I want to do as much as I can to prevent skin cancer.
-My Hair- I have very unmanagible hair. I go in and out of liking it all the time. Right now I don't like it much because I cut it short. My hair is very thick and curly, but most of the time its just frizzy. The frizziness got on my nerves for a long time, and I would flat iron it like crazy. Now I just accept it for what it is, and most of the time I like it. I can do a lot with it, and it holds curl really well. Also I don't have such greasy hair that it has to be washed everyday. That is a definite plus.

*I had planned on having some pictures to post with this, but due to some rainy weather I have not been able to take them. Some pics should follow soon.*

I Caved

For awhile now I have been telling myself how much I do not need an ipad. Well, today I caved in and bought one, and I love it! Although I do still feel a little bit guilty for buying it. I have been trying very hard to be less materialistic. If I have not said this before I am really into electronics. Honestly I do not know much about how they work, but I am all about the latest gadget. However, in the past I would get to thinking that my life was not going to go on if I did not get something. That feeling is what I have been working on. I know people who treat their electronics like they are people and are always on them no matter what. That is not how I want to be.
That leads me to a suggestion that I had for my husband recently. I said that I thought we should go unplugged one night a week. No TV, no cell phones, no computer...None of it!! That way we could talk or play games go for a walk etc. He is not being to receptive to it, but I think he will come around. If anyone is already doing this let me know how it works for you!

I have writers block...

So, I have not forgotten that this blog exists! I have been thinking about a lot of things that I want to write about. Yet when I go to do it I do not seem to be able to articulate any of the things I want to say.

I am working on it, and hopefully I will be able to make some good and interesting posts.

In the mean time if you enjoy shows like the Walking Dead or stories about zombies in general read my husband's blog: http://zombiecumberland.blogspot.com/

All of the characters he writes about are real people, but the names have been changed to protect the innocent! :)

Night Sledding!

My husband and I have a very unusual shaped yard. If you look at our house from the front you would think that we have almost no yard, but it is actually a very long narrow lot. Just our side our back door we have a little flat area and then the yard goes down hill and ends in a 100 year flood plane. Last night when some fresh snow fell we decided to try out our hill!! Turns out it is AWSOME!! Once we wore a path in the snow you could barely get on the sled before you were zipping down the hill. I could have probably played in the snow all night, but running up the hill wears you out after while. I am so glad we finally go to have a little fun with all the snow we have been getting!

By and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class.

Back in October I quit my job. This is the first time since I was sixteen that I have not been working. I will admit that is has been a bit strange, and sometimes boring. During this time that I have been off I have had a lot of time to think about what I want. It seems to me that society tells us that as modern women we should want to have a some big impressive career, but we do not put much emphasis on our home lives. Over these few months I have realized that I enjoy keeping my house up well. It gives me a sense of pride and fulfillment. I am sure feminists would tell me I need psychological help.

I have no problem with strong independent women. In fact I believe that I am one. Even though I am married and my husband is currently our sole source of income he is in the military which means that he leaves me for months at a time. During those times I have to be independent. What has happened to our society that we look down on homemakers? If you want a fancy career then I think that is great, but do not make me feel bad because I enjoy being a homemaker. I hate when working mother's talk about non working mother's like they are lazy. Yes I know I am not a mother, but I do know that it is probably the hardest job in the world. Mothers who stay home never get a break. Yes work is a break for most women.

It really makes me sad that our society has gotten away from family. Everywhere I look I see movies and TV shows that make being a single mother seem so glamorous. It is not glamorous it is hard and unless a spouse has passed away or is abusive I do not believe should happen. Actually this argument could be a whole other post, but I feel strongly about so many women having children with men they have no intention of marrying. Then the government rewards them by paying for everything.

My overall point of this entry is to convey that it does not make you lazy or weak if you choose to stay home. As long as that is what you choose, and I myself have chosen it. Decades ago I am sure many women were stuck and didn't want to stay home but had to. Now it is different. We have the opportunities open to us, but some of us would prefer to lead a different life. I will not put down your choices, so please do not put down mine.

It was a civilization; Gone with the Wind

Recently I reread "Gone with the Wind". I first read it when I was about 13 or 14, so it had been at least 15 or more years since I read it. Well a few weeks back I was watching the movie, and I thought that I would really love to revisit the book. I was able to find my original copy, but it was kind of worn and I didn't want to take a chance on messing it up. That original copy was special to me because it was a hard book to find that long ago and I hunted it down in a used book store. So, I purchased it on my Kindle. It took me much less time to read it this time which made me happy because I have made so much improvement where my dyslexia is concerned.

This second time reading it was so much different. I found that I had a much different understanding of all the characters. Also, while it is much different, I can identify with people you love going off to war. While reading this time I was able to truly grasp the complexities of Scarlett. She is such a terribly interesting person. I love the movie, but I just don't believe that it is possible to grasp the kind of person she is. Sometimes while reading I do not like her other times I love her, and a lot of the time I was somewhere inbetween.

As I have said I am from the south. I have lived in Tennessee my entire life, so the long lasting effects of the Civil War can still be felt here. I have been to all of the places in the book. They have always been a part of my life. Many of my friends still fly the Confederate flag. I would like to mention that I do not own any Confederate flags. Reason being, the racist message that they send. I have no problem with it if they were just a symbol of our history, but usually the people who fly them are racist, and I am absolutley not. Just wanted to get that out there.

The fashion in the book is also of much interest to me. I love the big hoop skirts and beautiful bonnets. I think women should dress more womenly these days. Now don't get me wrong I know that hoop skirts are not really practical for everyday life, but I do believe that women should wear dresses more. That being said I am making an effort to do just that, and my husband loves it!!

The picture I decided to put up for this blog is of Scarlett and Mammy. I love Mammy she seems almost mean in the beginning, but really she is such a loving, caring and wise person. We probably all have someone in our lives who reminds us of her.

If anyone has anything to say about "Gone with the Wind" be it the book or the movie I would love to have your comments! Whether you love the book/movie or hate it I want to hear from you. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and I am open to all! :)

Catching Up

It's been awhile since I posted. I had my 30th birthday!!Yay!! It was actually kind of anti-climactic. I don't feel any different or anything, but I did have a great birthday!

I didn't want a big party so myself my husband my cousin Chaya and her husband and my friend Jason all went out to a nice dinner. We chose an Italian restaurant that Chaya and I went to a lot in our early twenties. It was so much fun. The food was great as it always is there, but we sat for about two hours telling stories and laughing. Chaya was my roommate when I first moved out of my parents house, and while we had a rather large apartment it had so many problems that it was just crazy. We got to telling all of those stories and the next thing we knew we were crying from laughing so hard. That is the best feeling in the world.

Just to give a little history Chaya and I are first cousins so we have know each other all our lives. Chaya and I met Jason when we were both working for a hospital in Nashville. Jason and I became instant friends and not long after him and Chaya became close too. Chaya and I lived together and Jason lived in the neighboring apartment complex. For anyone who is wondering Jason is strictly a platonic friend. Chaya and I are not his type so to speak, and our husbands are totally ok with our friendship with him. Anyway that said he knew all of our stories because he lived most of them with us. Well Chaya and I can say a few words and know what were talking about then just start laughing. This leaves our poor husbands wondering what we find so funny!

The night was so good for me. Seeing how much we have all grown. What we have become, and even though we have had our rough patches we have remained close all this time. It was good to share my birthday with family. While Chaya is my actual family Jason I have considered a memeber of the family for years too. Infact he comes to all our family functions. I also believe that your friends are the family you make for yourself, and I am so very blessed to have such a wonderful family!! :)

What makes you a "GrownUp"???

My family and friends have been doing something for awhile that is really starting to bother me, and to be honest hurt my feelings. Most of the people I know that are my age or close to my age have children. Of course I think this is wonderful, but both of my friends and family have started to treat me as though I am selfish or not really an adult because I do not have children. As I have said my husband and I are trying, but it is taking a long time. Surprisingly as much as I mention that in this blog I do not often talk about it with my friends or family. That excludes my mother I do tell her how I am feeling, and her and my father are not the ones who are making me feel this way.

I am sure that nobody intends for this to happen, but they say things all the time that make me feel as if I am a bad person for not having children. When I talk about reading or sewing or a trip that my husband and I took they will make comments to the effect of I wish I had time and money for that stuff. Then I start to feel bad that I do have time to read and sew, but what am I supposed to do?

Mostly I get hurt when they treat me like I am less of an adult. I have been on my own for over a decade. I own a house and of course pay all of the bills and do all of the maintance that goes along with that. While I am not as good of a cook as my husband, I cook our meals most everynight. While my husband does make the money I am the one who takes care of paying the bills. I of course clean and do laundry and yard work etc.

Now do not get me wrong. I fully realize that there are a whole new set of responsibilities that come along with parenthood. However, it does hurt when these people act as if I am selfish and they are not. I know they don't realize it, but they are hurting me. I can not make myself get pregnant. Its not my fault that it is not easy for me. While I do refuse to let myself be unhappy just because I have yet to have a baby it does bother me. I want it, but am not willing to spend thousands of dollars to get pregnant. My husband and I will most likely adopt, but until we get to a more permanent duty station we can't consider it, because the court would not let us adopt while we are in so much transition.

Like I said, I am feel like the people who do this have no intention of making me feel bad. They probably have no idea that they have, but I just really had to get it off my chest.

Happily Ever After

My dear friend Delaney and her lovely fiance got married Friday afternoon. I am so very happy for her. She has had a long road to finding true love, and I believe that she has found a wonderful man in Raphael. I believe that they will live a very long and happy life together. The actually ceremony was private, but we were able to celebrate with them later that evening at the reception. It was great to be able to share their special day together. Unfortunately I did not get any pictures of the groom. He was was very excited and I couldn't get him to stand still long enough!! My husband was especially happy. Him and Dee worked nights together in Iraq for 15 months, so needless to say they developed a very deep friendship. Then when he returned home Delaney and I became instant friends. We were even fortunate enough to keep her children for her for a month while she had to go to a training school. That was such a blessing in itself. They are great children and I find myself missing them a lot. Of course I still get to see them, but it was really nice when they were here. I wish the couple a lifetime of love and happiness.